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© Copyright 1998 by Richard Holeton  
FIGURSKI AT FINDHORN WITH SPAM AND ROSELLINI'S 1737 MECHANICAL PIG

(December, 1993)

I’m trying to act normal, I’m trying to follow the action, be part of the scene. Couldn’t avoid Sharing, don’t want to arouse suspicion by staying alone in the trailer. I wonder what Streleski would do in this situation. I think they know I found something in the dunes. They probably want it, maybe it was intended for them, but it just dropped out of the sky is what I think. Easy enough to hide, they’re used to seeing me carry my duffel around, now taking up the extra seat beside me. I kept to myself in prison, they called me Egghead (I am the eggman, I am the walrus), which was better than "Many-Pens" (fuck you, Mounting-Dog!). Once this guy tried to get me into a show, he said I was perfect for the part, but I wasn’t interested in joining a bunch of convicted violent offenders play-acting like schoolkids in Twelve Angry Men. They all thought I thought I was better than them. Smarter. And they were right. Just not smart enough for Quentin, ha. Here though with all these post-hippies sharing maybe they think I’m stupid, they’re all so nice, they’re like Hey we don’t know what trip you’re on exactly but it’s cool man just find yourself. At least they don’t hassle me. Then suddenly there I am up on the stage, I don’t remember hoisting my duffel or walking up the aisle it’s like I’m drawn there, it seems so natural and unnatural at the same time that I wonder if I’m dreaming, I’m setting out the Pig on a stool saying I found this, it’s mine, Finders Keepers Losers Weepers, I pop open the pop-top Spam and the smell almost makes me keel over but I spoon some Pork Shoulder Product back into the Pig’s mouth just like we practiced in the trailer, and with the proper cranking he chews it real slow with some of the stuff kind of squishing out and dribbling down the chin, and with the right controls I speed up his digestive process for the Grand Finale, thinking to put newspaper down on the polished wood first. They’re all just looking at me like, Is that it then? so as an encore I have the Pig do a little dance, and they applaud courteously.